*The Five Toughest Female Questions Are: *
What are you thinking about?
Do you love me?
Do I look fat?
Do you think she is prettier than me?
What would you do if I died?
What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to
explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e. tells the
truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below,
along with possible responses.
*Question # 1: What are you thinking about?
*The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive,
dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring,
intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."
This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most
likely is one of the following:
a. Baseball.
b. Football.
c. How fat you are.
d. How much prettier she is than you.
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once
told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking
to you!"
Al Rules!!
*Question # 2: Do you love me?*
The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in
order, "Yes, dear."
* Inappropriate responses include:
a. I suppose so.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love.
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?
*Question # 3: Do I look fat?*
The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!"
Among the incorrect answers are:
a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I've seen fatter.
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would
spend the insurance money if you died.
*Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me?*
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!"
Incorrect responses include:
a. Yes, but you have a better personality
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
d. Define pretty
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would
spend the insurance money if you died.
*Question #5: What would you do if I died?*
A definite no-win question. (The real answer, or course, is "Buy a
Corvette.")
No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up
questions, usually along the these lines:
WOMAN: Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
MAN: Yes, I would.
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of
her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her drive my car?
MAN: No, she can't drive a 5-speed!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
What are you thinking about?
Do you love me?
Do I look fat?
Do you think she is prettier than me?
What would you do if I died?
What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to
explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e. tells the
truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below,
along with possible responses.
*Question # 1: What are you thinking about?
*The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I've been pensive,
dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring,
intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."
This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most
likely is one of the following:
a. Baseball.
b. Football.
c. How fat you are.
d. How much prettier she is than you.
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.
Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once
told Peg, "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking
to you!"
Al Rules!!
*Question # 2: Do you love me?*
The proper response is: "YES!" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in
order, "Yes, dear."
* Inappropriate responses include:
a. I suppose so.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love.
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?
*Question # 3: Do I look fat?*
The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!"
Among the incorrect answers are:
a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I've seen fatter.
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would
spend the insurance money if you died.
*Question # 4: Do you think she's prettier than me?*
Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!"
Incorrect responses include:
a. Yes, but you have a better personality
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age
d. Define pretty
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would
spend the insurance money if you died.
*Question #5: What would you do if I died?*
A definite no-win question. (The real answer, or course, is "Buy a
Corvette.")
No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up
questions, usually along the these lines:
WOMAN: Would you get married again?
MAN: Definitely not!
WOMAN: Why not - don't you like being married?
MAN: Of course I do.
WOMAN: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
MAN: Okay, I'd get married again.
WOMAN: You would? (With a hurtful look on her face)
MAN: Yes, I would.
WOMAN: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
MAN: Where else would we sleep?
WOMAN: Would you put away my pictures, and replace them with pictures of
her?
MAN: That would seem like the proper thing to do.
WOMAN: And would you let her drive my car?
MAN: No, she can't drive a 5-speed!
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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Subscribe: CoolCollectionsForYou-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
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List owner: CoolCollectionsForYou-owner@yahoogroups.com
R i z w a n-A l a m - Owner
Alam.Rizwan@Yahoo.com
Shamsher Afridi - Sr. Moderator
jimrizin@Yahoo.com
Raj Singh Tomar - Moderator/Designer
rajsinghtomar@aol.com
Nikita Anand - Moderator/Designer
hotnsexytulip@yahoo.com
------------------
DISCLAIMER :
------------------
This message serves informational purposes only and should not be viewed as an irrevocable indenture between anyone. If you have erroneously received this message, please delete it immediately and notify the sender at CoolCollectionsForYou-Owner@yahoogroups.com. The recipient acknowledges that any views expressed in this message are those of the Individual sender and no binding nature of the message shall be implied or assumed unless the sender does so expressly with due authority of The C.C.4.U. Group. reserves the right to repeal, change, amend, modify, add, or withdraw the contents herein without notice or obligation.
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